Curly

“Is this not the life undertaking of us all…to become human? It can be a long and painful process. It involves a growth to freedom, an opening up of our hearts to others, no longer hiding behinds masks or behind walls of fear and prejudice. It means discovering our common humanity.” (Jean Vanier: Becoming Human)

This quote became a reality to me. Years ago I met a man named Curly. His shirt was dirt stained much like his hands. He was homeless. He was an addict. He was also a nice guy when he wasn’t completely wasted. Curly frequented the overnight shelter for men that I worked at. The shelter was an incredibly important part of Uptown Chicago. Hundreds of people came during the days for food. Homeless families were housed in a secure area of the shelter. Homeless men stayed the night there every night of the year. I knew Curly very well. I saw him everyday. He started lots of trouble in the shelter. People don’t forget who they dislike on the street just because they are in a shelter. I broke up fights many times between him and others.

On the day in which the following scenario took place, it was extremely hot. The winters are freezing and summers are sizzling in Chicago. We ran out of cold drinks for the homeless guests we were serving that day. Tensions started to rise. I heard a disruption and looked over to find a guy had punched Curly in the nose and proclaimed that Curly had taken his drink. I immediately assumed that was the case because of my previous experience with Curly. I ran over to break it up and extended my hand to Curly to help him up. He looked at me with tears in his eyes and the clearest expression I’d ever seen. Crying, he told me through the tears that he was trying so hard to be clean. I got some Kleenex and paper towels to clean the blood off of the floor and off of him. That was the most humbling experience I have ever had. I took Curly to the side and spoke with him about trying to stay clean. I cried as he told me how he prayed and prayed and asked god for help but just couldn’t do it.

Curly disappeared for a while and I didn’t start seeing him until winter rolled around.
The shelter locks up after 10pm in order to keep all the security problems within the building. Sometimes if people get to the shelter too late they won’t have a place warm to sleep for the night. I started seeing Curly in the mornings in the lobby of my apartment building because he wouldn’t make it to the shelter in time. Our building was very open to allowing people to stay there out of the cold as long as they didn’t cause any problems. Curly was having problems with his addiction again. I never saw the clear look in his eyes again.

One morning I got off of the elevator and realized that the lobby was silent. There were EMTs putting Curly into an ambulance. I tried to yell to him to tell him I would go to Cook County and be there with him. The EMT said the words I didn’t want to hear. Curly had died. I later found out he had overdosed on heroin and died in our lobby.

Where is the common humanity in this? I have faults and addictions and propensities for certain behaviors as we all do. Although yours may differ from mine there lays solidarity in that fact. Becoming human: what does that mean? It is the realization that our behaviors may be different but the root of the problem remains constant.